This article, written by reporter Emma Kirwin, originally was published June 12 in The Brock Press, an independent student newspaper at Brock University. Dexter Bullen grew up in Orillia and went to school in Orillia; he represents the third generation of his family's roots in the community. The article is being reprinted with the permission of The Brock Press.
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In the midst of a global anti-racism movement, Dexter Bullen advocates for racial equality and affirmative pro-Black action.
Growing up in Orillia, Bullen’s family was well-known and one of the only Black families in the area. Despite being part of a respected community, Bullen still experienced racism.
“I grew up in Orillia, it is a really small town and there are very few Black people. My family was one of the more prominent Black families in the community, so everyone knew us," said Bullen.
"I felt privileged in the community I was in, even though I was a Black person. […] There is always racism, but for me specifically, it was a lot of indirect racism [as opposed to overt racism],” said Bullen.
Even as a child, Bullen was aware of the discrimination Black communities faced. Bullen navigated racism with optimism, hoping he could educate his white peers through open lines of communication and friendship.
“My whole life I was finding ways to get around racism in order to get along with people. Obviously it benefits you [as a Black person] to have people like you, whether they are racist or not. The reality is a lot of people are racist, but if you can be friends with them, communicate with them and talk with them, it helps people get over a lot of prejudice,” said Bullen.
Elementary school marks the beginning of Bullen’s experience with racism. He recalls the racial assumptions made about him, even as a child.
“Black kids have less assumed innocence than white kids, […] Black kids really numb themselves to it [racism] and try not to think about it,” said Bullen.
Bullen describes his experiences as a child as the beginning of a life-long battle with racially fuelled trauma. He recalls the use of the n-word in his elementary school classrooms as an early marker of racial inequality.
“While growing up I really didn’t like all the books we read in school that said the n-word, especially being one of the only Black kids in my class. It is a hurtful word. As a kid, no one addresses racism. We may have been reading a book for educational purposes but we never addressed that it isn’t okay to say the n-word,” said Bullen.
Bullen notes that the texts and curriculum in his elementary school posed harm to Black children. By teaching whitewashed colonialist history, Black children are denied their right to learn about Black history.
“The Black history we were taught in school was very negative. I think that is a huge microaggression. Police brutality is [blatant] violence, but I think not teaching Black people [their rich] history or only teaching kids about slavery and segregation is a form of violence in itself. That is just as aggressive as police murder,” said Bullen.
“White people learn about all the great white people throughout history, but all you learn about Black people is slavery. […] Most Black people go their entire life, or until they get out of the school system before they start educating themselves about Black history. That is violence in itself, that Black people only learn about themselves when they choose to educate themselves.”
After seeking to learn about Black history himself, Bullen says that his voice was still snuffed out in predominantly white classrooms.
“Slavery put a pause on Black history, Black people have had a history since the beginning of time,” said Bullen. “When I figured this out and would share my thoughts in class, I was shunned for it.”
Bullen describes these experiences as a child and young adult as the foundation for a life of struggling with feelings of inferiority.
“The inferiority complex that [white-centric education] creates inside the minds of Black kids is terrible,” said Bullen.
As Bullen grew up he was subjected to racial slurs. These slurs were no longer in reference to texts in classrooms but directed at him as a young Black man. He began to avoid conflict with his white peers in order to cope with the hate being directed towards him.
There is a common misconception in Canada that the we are free of prejudice, racism and discrimination. Bullen’s experiences, however, shine a light on the fact that both covert and overt forms of racism are alive and well.
“Growing up I experienced explicit [overt] racial incidents too, […] like people called [me] the n-word a lot. You have to find a coping mechanism of ignoring it or numbing yourself to it because if not, you constantly get into fights and conflicts about racism,” said Bullen.
“One of the problems people have with the Black Lives Matter movement here in Canada is that they think there is no racism. A lot of the racism is covert racism; things in our institutions, things in our educational system, in our laws. […] A lot of white people don’t see that and don’t understand that.”
Explicit racial slurs are only one side of the paradigm of racism Bullen faced. In Bullen’s experience, racism is reinforced and expressed in many different forms.
“I’ve had times in stores where I’ve had employees grab my bag and look in it to see if I stole anything, or I’ve been followed around stores,” said Bullen, “It happens all the time.”
Bullen has been the target of racism for his entire life. Presently, he is navigating the turbulent, uncharted waters of the recent pro-Black social justice movement. White guilt is inevitable at this time but must be channelled into positive change, without squashing the voices of Black people.
“For white people, I think there is a lot of guilt associated with learning about what is going on right now. White people want to help, but don’t want to support the white saviour complex or make it about white people,” said Bullen.
“I see on social media white people are really eager to help […] But, a lot of posts from white people are quoting white people. Which is okay, but there are so many Black voices throughout history that have said great things and made progress for the Black community that people could be posting.”
Bullen urges white allies to elevate and listen to Black voices as protests for equality gain traction across North America.
“I think the best thing white people can do is just listen to what Black people have to say,” said Bullen. “It is important for white people to not feel personally attacked by any of this. […] You’re born into this world just like anybody else, you’re not responsible for colonialism or slavery, but now you are in this world and benefiting from the system. Choose to do the right thing, it is not about white versus Black, it is about good versus evil.”
Although the recent wave in anti-racism protests has proved powerful and a step in the right direction, Bullen explains that white people must strive to grasp the gravity and meaning of protests.
“White people can use their power, privilege and positions in society to move the culture [of anti-racism] forward,” said Bullen. “White people can be on the right side of history here. Black people do not want to rule the world, Black people just want equality. Black people want to live their lives without being murdered by the police.”
Despite the outpouring of support, there has been backlash against protests and social media campaigns supporting Black Lives Matter and similar causes.
Bullen contextualizes the recent calls for action as not a loss for white people, but a win for Black people.
“I think a lot of the racism coming out of this movement is because white people feel like they are being attacked, which I understand because people do not realize the position of power they are in, they only notice when change occurs. You could have all the privilege and power in the world but as soon as you lose a little bit of that power, you feel like you lost all of it, like you are now being oppressed. You don’t notice the position of power you are in unless it is slipping away,” said Bullen.
“When things change, progress and society becomes more equal and accepting. White people are not going to lose the privilege they have, Black people just want a little bit of it too. Black people don’t want to be killed in the streets by cops and that is not too much to ask.”
Aside from Bullen’s encouragement for white allies, he is passionate about the Black driven side of this revolution.
“It is great to have white allies and white people on board, but real revolution and real change is going to be pushed forward by Black people, for Black people,” said Bullen. “Black people need to stand in total, global solidarity. That has always been a goal since post-colonialism but has never come to fruition. […] It is hard to unify the global Black population, but I think social media has really helped that.”
Social media has forced millions to confront the reality of police brutality perpetrated against Black people. The recent deaths of Ahmaud Arbery and George Floyd were filmed, and the actions of the perpetrators unjustifiable, which led to an outpouring of outrage and disgust as millions and millions took to social media to share in their grief.
Bullen says that social media has forced him to come to terms with the dire, sickening state of race relations today.
“[This movement] is so big. My whole life I’ve grown up seeing Black people shot by the police. […] As a defence mechanism I would numb myself to it [police brutality], but now I have no choice but to confront it because of social media. It was so loud on social media, there are no distractions now, the matrix has been closed,” said Bullen.
The unfiltered, relentless nature of social media can be positive in its ability to amplify voices globally. Yet, social media can be detrimental when racist messages are the ones being amplified and given a world-wide platform.
“Some days I would just break down, I am not emotionally expressive but I was really struggling with it [watching the video of Geroge Floyd’s murder]. Yet after all of that, I still had white people defending it [on social media]… like ‘Is that what you’re upset about? The looting and rioting when a man has been murdered in the street? 400 years of slavery, rape and murder and you’re mad about looting and rioting?’”
Social media has been one of the most prominent components of this wave of anti-racism. As helpful as social media can be to spread the word about protests and educate white allies, Bullen urges people to support the pro-Black cause financially.
“[The role of social media] has divided a lot of people and drawn lines in the sand, but it has brought attention to this [racism],” said Bullen. “Use your money. White people, corporations and the people that really run this world listen to money. Once Black people start speaking with their money then I think there is going to be some real change. […] It is all about Black businesses and Black communities coming together and supporting each other.”
Although social media campaigns and donations have added wind to the sails of this anti-racism movement, protests have been the epicentre of action. Bullen attended protests in Toronto and Niagara Falls. Both proved to be incredible momentous, cathartic experiences for him.
“It was so good to see Black people organizing together and doing something positive. In Toronto it was so much more than just Black people coming together, it was white people too. Seeing all those white people come out and stand in solidarity with a Black cause was crazy, I couldn’t believe it. I was taken aback,” said Bullen. “The police were very into it [the protest] too, they were working in conjunction with the people who organized the protest. It went really smoothly.”
Protesting helped Bullen express his commitment to pro-Black advocacy in a momentous way.
“The protest felt like a huge relief for me,” said Bullen. “The Niagara Falls protest was amazing. […] There were eight minutes of silence where everyone took a knee, we did it [at the same time as] the protestors in Buffalo. It was so emotional. I broke down crying and it is so weird because I am not very emotional.
"I looked around and saw thousands of Black people and thousands of white people altogether. I felt so much support, I had so many emotions built up. I felt a whole lifetime of trauma just melt away," said Bullen. "All of the defence mechanisms I put up as a Black person to prevent myself from getting hurt melt away as I let go of the prejudice and resentment that I held towards white people. I felt so connected to everybody [at the protest]. It was overwhelming, when I stood up I realized everyone else was crying too.”
The humanity found in people coming together for one righteous cause forced demonstrators to realize that these are not just Black lives being lost, they are human lives.
“I really think it is a turning point right now. It is not just a Black guy being murdered, it is a man being murdered. That could be anybody. It doesn’t just matter about the colour of your skin, it is the social order and a social construct,” said Bullen.
“White people need to realize that it could be them… that could be you. It just so happens in our society, our social order and the way our history is written that it is Black people [who face police brutality]. This is more than just a race thing,”
Despite facing racism head-on and first-hand, Bullen remains unwaveringly optimistic.
“I truly think that good will conquer evil in the end.”
